Relationships are the key to making almost anything happen. They are the foundation to the quality of our lives and to the results we get from our actions. Giving of yourself in friendship is a gift that keeps on giving.
I am reminded of the story of a small boy and girl that were building a sand castle on the beach. They spent hours building towers, walls, and a moat. As they were building, the tide crept slowly in. Suddenly, a big wave wiped it all away.
An adult nearby felt sorry for them because of all the work they had put into building the castle, until the two children held hands and ran off together, laughing as they scampered down the beach.
It was then that the adult realized a simple truth; it is fun building empires, but the lasting fun is in having friends you can continue to laugh with and be with long after all that you have spent your life building has washed away.
To make a friend, we need to be a friend. There are a few simple steps we can take to be a friendly person to everyone we come in contact with.
Be Agreeable. When you smile, and nod in agreement with a person who is talking, he or she feels respected and more valuable. When you look them in the eye with a smile on your face and love in your heart, they will feel like what they have to say is important and therefore he or she is also important.
Don’t Argue. Do you feel like you always need to be right? You can win all the arguments, but you will lose all the friends. The best way to disagree with someone you feel is incorrect is use a “third-party disagreement.” For example you could ask “What do you think our teacher would say if she knew what we were doing?” Your decision to become an agreeable and easy-going person will lower your stress levels and increase your ability to influence others to help you.
Acceptance. When two people meet it is important to establish a certain level of acceptance. When you offer genuine, unconditional acceptance, you can raise another person’s self-esteem, improve their self image, and make him or her feel relaxed and safe in your company.
Smile, Smile, Smile! A genuine smile says a lot. When you smile at another human being, he or she feels valuable, important and worthwhile. The added bonus when you smile is you will raise your own self-esteem by making the effort to raise the self-esteem of others.
Express your Gratitude. You may feel appreciative, but do you always show it? Get in the habit of always saying “thank you”. Take the time to write or type a thank you note for anything that a person has done. This will go a long way to make him or her feel valuable, more competent and more worthwhile.
It has been said that little children cry for it; grown men die for it – to feel important! When people are genuinely praised by someone they respect, their enthusiasm and alertness increase and they feel much better about themselves. The happiest and most popular people are those who go through their lives being genuinely grateful for the things that happen to them and for everyone they meet. So, begin the to gift of friendship process today by smiling at everyone you meet and remember to say “thank you.”