STAY BITTER OR GET BETTER
By: Jill Lang
Bitter? Party of one. Bitter?
I was bitter - it's hard work. Its kinda like getting a new puppy. It can seem like a good idea at the time, but then it grows, makes messes and chews holes in your favorite shoes or your furniture. It causes damage. You have to feed it and walk it and scoop up the poo it leaves behind. Work, I tell you! Same with that unforgiveness you're carrying around. It's keeping you workin'.
Maybe you don't think you're bitter at all. Completely justified in your full-time job of seething, loathing, and unforgiveness. Honestly, how many times have you told the story or repeated the incident in your head? It could be the absolute truth that you've been wronged; betrayed, abused, abandoned, lied to, stolen from, taken advantage of or ________________. Fill in the blank.
Listen to me. I KNOW. Wounds come in all shapes, sizes, contexts. We've all got a story to tell. I need you to understand something, however, it's like carrying a big box of rocks. It's bondage and it's killing you. There is scientific research that has revealed a direct correlation between bitterness and physical ailments, i.e. back/neck pain, insomnia and even cancer.
Have you ever met an elderly person who is mean and grumpy? Bitter. Ever had a friend or co-worker who sucked the life out of you with their negativity? Bitter. How about you? If I brought up so-and-so right now would it get your emotions riled up? Bitter.
So maybe you're asking, "How do I get free?" How do I put down these rocks?
Forgive. I know you think I'm nuts because I have no clue what so-and-so did to you. Maybe you're saying I hear
you Jill, but it's hard to forgive. Don't misunderstand me I didn't say you had to be in relationship with so-and-so. So-and-so may even be dead. I'm saying forgive; meaning give what has'nt been earned. You can declare (preferably out loud) "By an act of my will, I choose to forgive so-and-so." Release them. You can do it. It's not hard, it's simply a choice, NOT a feeling.
In choosing to forgive, you free yourself. You've got a life to live and people to love. The fact is it's hard to embrace life or others when you're carrying a big box of rocks.
